OUR DEATH HAS NOT BEEN IN VAIN

Someone thought they would hurt our world if they shot us up

They shot us but they could not shut us up

Someone chose our location because we were gay

Now, gay or straight, the world has united to keep hate at bay

An action fuelled by hate and now we are the late

Though he made us late, we’ve become love’s bait

Homophobia has been dealt a huge blow because we died

Now through our death, the value of diversity is now on the rise

Religious folk now have to face the truth about the love they profess

“We have much work to do in the area of inclusion” they confess

‘Love not Hate’ is now the chant over mountains and plains

For indeed our death has not been in vain

Orlando Shooting Victims Collage
http://www.advocate.com/crime/2016/6/15/city-orlando-begins-release-list-those-killed-pulse-nightclub-shooting

We Have Authority

Yesterday, I believed I committed a faux pas so shame and blame flogged me relentlessly. 

I tried to stuff myself with a very rich cream cake but that didn't help. My last thoughts yesternight and my first thoughts this morning, were of this 'great' mistake.

I was so weighed down by it that I almost didn't go for my morning walk. I sluggishly dressed up determined to keep my commitment to myself and then commenced on my walk.

My start was quite slow because I was carrying this burden that made every step so hard for me, but I kept plodding along.

I normally play Gospel songs on my morning walks but this morning I didn't even feel like playing any song, so I began facebooking. 

I had promised myself that I will never go to Facebook on my morning walk, but this morning I did. After about 5 minutes of facebooking, I realized what I was doing and stopped.

5 minutes later, I remembered Andrae Crouch's "Through it all", googled it on my phone and began to play it. Surprisingly, that didn't really make me feel any better. Normally playing gospel songs precedes my time of prayer, praise and worship, but I couldn't even open my mouth this morning. 

I kept replaying the song until I had a 'Eureka' moment. 

I remembered a conversation I had with a friend yesterday about how the most difficult battle we fight with ourselves in our time of pain, is the one we fight within our minds. 

Joyce Meyer's book "The Battlefield of the mind" also came to my mind at this point and I asked myself what I was doing allowing the devil mess with my mind. I immediately rebuked him and told the spirits of shame and blame to be silent and go back to hell where they belonged.

After doing this, I continued to listen to the song and about 5 minutes later, I realized I no longer had the burden and yesterday's faux pas was no longer a sword of Damocles hanging over my head. I was free! 

This really got me thinking of the authority that we have as believers and how often we as Christians, go about in life assaulted and traumatized by the devil because we don't use it.

If we don't use our authority, the devil will continue to run roughshod over our lives and emotions and, we will never live victorious lives. We have to speak to him, commanding him in the name of Jesus and he has no choice but to obey.

As long as we're alive, the battle does not stop, so we have to be alert to recognize his wiles.

We must learn to be deliberate in our walk and determined to emerge victorious from every battle he brings our way.

Remember, the outcome was sealed on Calvary's Cross. Victory is already ours, we just need to lay hold of it by using our authority.

I AM WOMAN

Inside of pain, I find unbelievable gain

In the midst of chaos, I create a calm space

Out of scandals, I birth an honourable story

When I face challenges, I see opportunities for progress

Outside of love, I build a relationship with enduring affection

Who am I?

I am Woman

I nourish and I nurture

I am the life that brings forth lives

I am the hand that builds homes

I am the one that makes or breaks man

I am the womb that grows tiny zygotes into great men

Who am I?

I am Woman

You build a house, I make it home

You are the head of the family, I am the neck that guides our direction

Your arms protect our children, my hands groom them to rule the world

O’man, I was formed from your rib but I support your heart and hearth

Without me, there would be no form or beauty in our world

Who am I?

I am Woman

Shame on You!!!

Shame on those of you

who hide under the guise of Christianity

to pick people's hearts and then take their sufferings

to your family and friends as dinner table conversation

Shame on those of you

who pretend to care so people can confide in you

only for you to spread their struggles

as dirty linens on the streets

Shame on those of you

who say you understand

but really blame the people who trust you with their challenges

for the difficulties that they face in life

Shame on those of you

who protect the perpetrators of injustices

and vilify the victims, shaming them and blaming them

because the perpetrators are your benefactors or close family members

Shame on those of you

that discuss the confidences shared with your friends

and betraying their trust because

you know they can't or won't fight back

Shame on all of you!!!

Keeping a Marriage Together

I recently read a condolence message to Celine Dion about her husband’s passing. As part of that Facebook post, the person wrote “... how you're able to keep a celebrity marriage for 21yrs is a marvel; obviously there was more to you …”.

That post got me thinking of the many times women have been counseled to improve themselves and their offerings to their husbands, even in an abusive situation, so that they can enjoy their marriage. Christians, of which am one, are wont to quote the scripture in Proverbs 14:1 that says “A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands.” (NLT). They use this scripture to buttress their point that the success or failure of a woman’s marriage is her responsibility.

Because of this societal expectation, the woman struggles amidst all sort of abuse, most commonly emotional, to fulfill this huge responsibility that has been thrust upon her shoulders. Many times, she fails miserably, because she is not omnipotent and one person cannot do the work of two.

Marriages, whether celebrity or not, work when the couple are committed to their relationship. It works when they value each other and put one another first. There is no place for selfishness in marriage, only selflessness.

The School of Thought that burdens a woman with the sole responsibility of making her marriage work seems to have forgotten that age-long saying that “You can lead a horse  to water, but you can't make it drink.” For us Bible Thompers, as my dear friend calls us, what will be our answer to the question in Amos 3:3, “Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?” (NLT)

Marriage is a covenant and according to http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/, a covenant is 

1. a usually formal, solemn, and binding agreement 
2. a written agreement or promise usually under seal between two or more parties especially for the performance of some action

At the marriage ceremony, when each person says “I do”, they have agreed to live together in marriage. They have promised to love, comfort, honor and keep their spouse for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, and forsaking all others, be faithful only to them, for as long as they both shall live. This is a formal and binding agreement.

One respected Pastor tweeted this recently, “Marriage will test the strength of one's character. When marriage fails @ least one person did not have the strength of character ‪#‎AmourDance”.

This is indeed the truth.

So, instead of blaming the woman for her marriage troubles when she seeks help, ask the man how he’s keeping his own part of the agreement.

The reason 85% of intimate partner abuse are women* is that even when people are aware, the man is mollycoddled whilst the woman is asked to make all the changes. When it gets to a point, the woman will begin to bottle up and in her frustration, she may unwittingly escalate the situation.

Men need to tell their fellow men, the truth. In fact, we all need to tell one another the truth.

Successful marriages are the result of two people committed to:

1. staying together
2. putting each other first and
3. loving one another through life’s challenges

*    * http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/23/domestic-violence-statistics_n_5959776.html

Testing Church Waters

I recently moved churches.

It was a hard decision but then I remembered that my last Home Church was decided on after several ‘tests’ with others, lots of prayer and soul searching. I only settled on a Church when my Spirit rested and I had peace in the place. 

As Christians, the Bible teaches us that those who are led by God’s Spirit are His sons and daughters. Sometimes we may even say our decisions were made by God’s leading but eventually realize that we may have been wrong, when we lose our peace and experience trouble all around us.

This is what made me understand that my decision to move Churches was not wrong.

Some people say that changing churches is spiritual prostitution but as far as I know, the Bible tells us that Jesus is the Way. The Bible did not tell us that our salvation is hinged on the Church we attend.

So many are so focused on what humans will say or think that they become deaf to what God has said and is still saying. As followers of Christ, we must be courageous enough to follow God and not man because we will end up living with the consequences of our decisions, whether we did it to please people or we made them to please God.

I believe there are 4 things we can check to confirm where God is leading us as regards Church Membership.

1.       Your loyalty to leadership

You cannot be a member of a congregation and despise your leadership.

As soon as you begin to despise your Pastor, their words and ways, you need to prayerfully relocate because your being there is just a waste of time for you. If you give your time and even honour to your leadership grudgingly, do not expect any blessing because The Bible tells us that God loves a cheerful giver.

You cannot receive any impartation from your Pastors when you do not value the anointing upon them. You cannot attract what you despise.

In my former Church, I met many people who had issues with leadership and some of them were leaders themselves. They badmouthed the Pastor and did not appreciate the honour bestowed upon them. They were deeply unhappy and yet they remained there. Some were quick to inform me that they were only there for a time and did not care whose horse was gored.

Each day, I wonder why people remain in a Church, of all places, where they are so hurt they cannot even be open enough to receive any blessing from the message.

Christianity is a faith-based walk and where your thoughts are tainted by hurt and pain, faith would be difficult to grow.

God’s gift makes rich and adds no sorrow, so once there is sorrow in the gift of fellowship, you have to take a second look, in case you just got dazed by the angel of light – Satan.

2.       Alignment of your Values

If your values do not align with the majority, you have to backtrack because you’ll be beating your head against a brick wall expecting them to change.

Change, is indeed possible but know that even God’s Word tells us that two cannot work together except they agree.

If your values do not align with that of church Leadership, then disagreement is inevitable and therefore, progress will be elusive. Be conscious that hurt will be your reward because you cannot come and overturn long standing traditions without the backing of those in authority.

3.       Too much Talk

Church is a place Christians go to refuel their spiritual vehicles so that they can effectively and efficiently navigate life’s terrain. It is a place where you take what you've received back to conquer your world. It is not a place where you go to get the victim mentality because the words are different from the actions.

If you attend a Church that leaves you with much to ‘talk’ about after the service, you need to rethink your membership. If you want to get a degree in GOSSIPING, Church should not be the place for it.

4.       Check Yourself

When all is said and done, we need to check ourselves also, to be sure that we are not the problem. We could become the problem when we join the ‘Talkers’ to badmouth the leadership and the Church’s methods. We become the problem, when we forget what the Bible says about love and start acting like stark unbelievers, judging and reacting. We become the problem, when we start disobeying God’s instructions because of what people have done or said to us. We become the problem when we begin to gallivant with the chickens, forgetting that we are Eagles.

A time comes in a Christian’s life, when they have to choose to live for God by absolutely following His written instructions and listening for His verbal instructions. That is the time when we do crazy things that people cannot understand, for God. It is a time when our lives are not concerned about what people say but are driven by what God says.

It is when we get to that point that we can truly enjoy being members of any Church. 

2015: LESSONS LEARNED

2015 comes to an end.

For some it was a year of resounding victories. For others it was the worst year of their lives. For another group, it was comme si comme ca, neither here no there.

For me, it was a year of lessons. Life building and life changing lessons, Lessons I hope to work with in 2016.

In 2015, life was a kaleidoscope of colours, some bright and some dull. Among the bright, there was the dazzle and there was the glitter. Among the dull, were the sombre and the drab.

Bright was the joy of a love rekindled, dull was the reality of betrayal.

Dazzling were the friendships that looked like lifesavers, sombre was the sound of gossip and judgement from the same source.

In the glitter of church, I found the drabness of humanity’s weakness exposed.

I can say now that I know better, because I survived 2015.

I came through 2015 so that I can enter 2016 with these truths.

1. You must love yourself first and show it, before you expect others to love you. Show your love for yourself in your habits, conversations and lifestyle.
2. Guard your heart with all diligence because that is the root of your life’s source. Watch what you read, listen to and think about.
3. Go where you are celebrated and not where you are tolerated.
4.  Spend more time doing good and less time talking about those that are not doing good.
5. Be a builder of lives not a destroyer. Don’t delight in pulling people down, humiliating them and making them feel bad about themselves. Cheer the weak on to strength, cheer the discouraged on with encouragement. Be a lifter and not a downer.
6.  Forgiveness is a choice you must make if you want to truly live free. Let everyone that has hurt you go, in your mind, thoughts and actions.
7. Try to laugh even when life isn’t funny. Make it a priority to create an environment of happiness in and around yourself. Appreciate little happenings in your life, like getting the only parking spot left in that lot, receiving that compliment, . . .  Let your gratitude be more than your complaints, everyday.
8. Invest less time on Facebook and more time on your LIFEbook.
9. There is no better time to do the things you love than NOW. So, get going and write that line, sing that song, learn that new skill, cook that meal, do that thing you’ve always said you will do. Enjoy living. Take a walk and enjoy the flowers, go to the museum, savour the art in the Art Gallery, go to the cinema and watch a movie.
10.  The Government is not an individual but the sum total of each of us. So, instead of badmouthing those in authority, get involved in your community and affect the lives of everyone that interacts with you positively.
11.  There is no knight in shining armour anywhere that will ride in on a steed to change your life’s situation, you have to help yourself. To do this you must begin with being true to yourself about your failures/mistakes, then set goals for where you’d like to be at the end of 2016 and work towards them one day at a time.
12. Take your own advice. Walk your talk.

On that note, I sign off to do number 12 and get ready for a great 2016.

Have a very happy and fulfilling year 2016!