For the Mother That’s Not Loved by the Father of Her Children.

For the mother that’s not loved by the father of her children.

You know yourself. You know your situation. And the Lord knows too, and this is His Word for you.

You have been shown and been told that you’re not loved by the father of your children. This may have nothing to do with anything that you did or have not done, but this is the situation that you’ve found yourself and it hurts. To make matters harder, you share children with this man and the research out there about such situations is scary.

Yes, you know that the research says that children who grow up in homes where the father is absent, are more likely to struggle with depression, anxiety, or schooling. Studies even show that when a father is physically present but emotionally absent, they can leave wounds just as deep as one who isn’t there at all.

When you look at your children and then look at what you’re going through with their father, you worry. You may even be seeing some behaviours from them that make you worry whether your children are already a statistic. And you are terrified about their future.

But our God is an awesome God and He turns scientific studies on their head.

Look at the story of Leah.

The Bible records that right from the get-go, Leah was not loved and she knew it. But the Bible tells us that because God saw that she was not loved, He opened her womb, He gave her capabilities that her rival did not have. Also, from among the children of Leah, the woman that was not loved, God established the lineage of the one that saved us - the lineage of Jesus, the Savior of the world.

He also did this in the story of Haggai. She was not loved. In fact, she was used, abused and thrown out. But the Lord established the lineage of her son Ishmael.

In Leah and Haggai’s story, we see that God knows and sees women in such situations. In fact, Haggai was the one that first called God, El Roi - the God that sees me, in the bible.

So if you are a woman who knows what it is to be unloved and emotionally abandoned, and you are worried about your children’s outcomes, please hear this: the statistics do not get the final say. Social workers do not get the final say. Psychologists and therapists do not get the final say. Your God does.

Your children may even be grappling with challenges from this situation already, but know that God can still step in. In fact, He will definitely step in.

Yes, the world’s numbers say your children are at risk. But the Word of God says your children are blessed. The world’s reports predict brokenness. God’s Word declares restoration. Where man’s absence leaves a wound, God’s presence brings healing.

You may also be living with the guilt of having put yourself and your children in this situation by not leaving. But you also know that the situation you’ve found yourself is so complicated by various realities that you only have the emotional bandwidth to do what you can where you are at this time.

Your God sees you. Even if your mistakes led you here, He will not abandon you. That is His promise in Romans 8:38, nothing can separate you from His love.

Take your eyes off the man who does not love you and focus your thought and mind on the God who does. He is writing a story for you and your children that no study, no statistic, and no physically or emotional absent father can destroy. It is well with you and your children.

In Jesus Mighty Name. Amen.